Wednesday, November 19, 2008

New life....

Okay, enough background, time to get to the heart of the matter.

We were close, very close. The closer we got the more the lack of results got to us. Add into that mix a couple of away rotations for me at 4 and 6 weeks at a time, we came to realize that this was a pretty challenging process. Questions about the latest core-body temperature had entered into our lives right after the regular "How was your day?" As the end of each cycle neared we both knew exactly what the other was thinking, "Is this the month?" The weeks after ovulation were the worst because what's done is done, all you can do is wait. We pepped each other up constantly, but during this lull period conversations tended to avoid the elephant in the room so as not to inflame anxiety during this time of waiting to see what might be.

Early on in the process it was no big deal, we were more content to wait a good while before testing. As the months wore on, we found ourselves researching which tests would give the earliest results, how accurate they were, what other signs we could look for as an earliest possible indicator of the goal, anything to shorten that two week lull period.

Then, a glimmer of hope. Jaynah had a few early symptoms, which we had seen before with no payoff but then she took an early pregnancy test and saw a touch of blue. It was pretty early, but we had read that any color at all was a positive test. Jaynah made me look at it to make sure she wasn't crazy, and I had no choice but to agree it was very faint, but it was definitely blue, barely. I tried to calm her down, while at the same time calming myself, we had come a long way, seen a lot of indicators and ended up being disappointed. Let's just be cool, and wait a few more days when the test will be a little less ambiguous.

So we waited. I had to go to Atlanta to take part of my medical boards. It was on a Monday morning, so she decided to come along with me. We went to dinner that Sunday night, got a hotel near the testing center, and I did some studying before turning in early for a good night's sleep. Jaynah was a trooper in helping me focus, helping me study, and suspending baby watch operations until after this huge hurdle (the boards) was behind us, or so I thought.

As I found out after the fact, she didn't sleep a wink, thinking, praying, hoping, anticipating. At 5:00 a.m. she couldn't wait any longer, it was too much, so she went and took a pregnancy test. This time there was no question, we could have painted the room with the amount of blue that line showed. She couldn't contain herself, but she did. I had my boards that morning and my alarm wasn't set to go off until 6:00 a.m. She wanted me to get every ounce of rest I could, so she laid in bed, looking at me, completely silent for a whole hour. I wouldn't have been that patient but at 5:59 a.m. September 15, 2008, she woke me:

"Baby, we're pregnant."


matt said...

you guys are awesome!!! this post totally made me smile

Suzanne said...

so..maybe you can tell...but im just now catching up on your blog post...this one made me tear up too.

aww just soo excited for you!!!